Now, Bird Flu

Got an advisory on 'Avian Flu' just today.

[Wonder why 'Avian' is being substituted for 'Bird', considering that 'Influenza' is still referred to as 'Flu'!]

In brief:

• Stay away from live animal markets, poultry farms and "any surfaces that appear to be contaminated by faeces from poultry or other animals". I'd love to be pigeon now - earlier I was merely irritating car owners by crapping all over their Maseratis. Now a single anal projectile can render the car useless!
• Wash your food thoroughly, especially eggs. Cook it really well

This place is beginning to really frighten me, not least because my lunch spread now reads 'Mad Cow Disease, Avian Flu, Foot-and-Mouth Disease / Tapeworm and icky undersea fauna with a side of rice'.